Saturday, 25 January 2014

Solitude

Every now and then, I need a little bit of time where I'm not around other people. It makes me sound really rather antisocial, and I guess in some ways it is antisocial- but needs must and to be honest, if I don't get a little bit of alone time every now and then I can become downright unpleasant to be around. Sometimes, I need to step back, move away from people, and just breathe.



Yesterday was one of those days. We hosted a 1920s themed birthday party for my housemate L on Friday night, and Saturday begun with ten hungover twenty-somethings crammed around our kitchen table for a big breakfast pulled together by me and the birthday boy. Once we'd all been suitably fed and watered, we all melted away to our own doings, and I drifted off for episodes of Grey's Anatomy, a mug of tea, and a nap.

But by mid afternoon, I was feeling the need for some fresh air. I pulled on my new favourite boots and my favourite burgundy coat, and headed out into the late afternoon sunshine. I found myself a few minutes later standing by Roath Park lake, watching the seagulls fight over a piece of bread, and standing my ground against the wind, which was strong enough to blow tears from my eyes.



And I stood there in the last of the afternoon sunshine, thinking about how I seem to have made some pretty good decisions recently. Being an adult is all about making decisions, it seems- from what to have for supper and whether to go out on Friday night, to where to go on holiday, whether to take that job, where to live, and who you want to have around you. I'm not in the business any more of being around people who don't make me happy- or those who like having me around because it makes them feel better. No, I like being around the people who make me feel good about myself, who want me to be happy, and who I want to make happy too. And I feel like right now, I'm around those sorts of people, and there's nothing nicer than that.

As I strolled back from the lake, I decided that I wasn't quite ready to go home- so I took myself off for a pot of tea and a daydream, and ended up people watching in Coffee #1, where the table next to me was occupied by the sweetest little girl and her parents.

And it was all I needed. Just a little bit of time out has meant that I don't mind that I'm spending my Saturday night with a group of people I really don't know all that well, or have plans for every night this week. I'm feeling centered, and happy, and ready to put my game face back on.


12 comments:

  1. It sounds like a lovely afternoon and a great place to get some quiet time to yourself. Last night I decided that during half term I'm going to just take myself into town for the day and wander and potter and see where my feet takes me. It's ages since I did that as usually I'm always with someone else and in a bit of a rush. Sometimes it's just what you need to have some solitude. Have a good rest of the weekend! x

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  2. I definitely need alone time after lots of socialising to recharge and just get back to feeling myself. There's a park just across from my house which is perfect for this!

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  3. I'm completely the same. If I don't get my alone time I feel like I might burst. Honestly, there are time when I would much rather go for a long walk alone then go to a party. Beautiful photos. Just reading this post has made me feel more relaxed. I hate making decisions... they stress me out! www.prettynostalgia.blogspot.co.uk

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  4. i'm the same. though i don't mind company from people, but i also need my alone time. really.
    these photos are so peaceful.

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  5. Lovely post. I think a lot of people are like you and need the odd moment to be alone to recharge. I love it too and the photos of your 'solitude' are lovely.

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  6. Such a lovely, heartfelt post. This is really different to the things I normally read online, but I really appreciated it. You've inspired me to spend a little more time on my own, outdoors, exploring. Not necessarily in a geographical sense, but perhaps occasionally in a soul-searching sense. Thanks Alice!

    - Tabitha at Scared Toast x

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  7. Can definitely agree with you on this. Alone time is the best. I usually take myself off for a swim or a walk once a week by myself. I live with my OH and as much as it's lovely to be with him, it's nice to escape :)
    Roath park is very pretty though and there's nothing like the wind to blow out the cobwebs!
    Glad you're feeling good :) x

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  8. I love days like this where you can just feel yourself being yourself - does that make sense?! The lake looks gorgeous and just the place for a bit of a think. I know what you mean about decision making - I'm so bad at it as well, being a grown up is pretty tricky sometimes x

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  9. I agree with this so much! I sometimes like to take myself off for a hot chocolate or just a walk. My favourite thing about it is not having to work to anyone else's agenda. I am free to do what I want to do. It helps clear my head and I'm able to think for myself clearly. And as I'm the worst decision maker in the world I need this time for me. I agree adult life is a series of decisions that seem to get trickier. No one told me about that!
    Kate xx
    http://appreciatetheday45.blogspot.co.uk/

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  10. I think it's completely normal to need 'alone time' or 'quiet time' every now and then. I recently read a post from Bangs and a Bun on being an introvert (http://www.bangsandabun.com/2014/01/im-an-introvert/) and what struck me was the comment of being drained by social encounters and energised by solitary and often creative pursuits. This just about sums me up! I love seeing my friends and socialising, but like you I feel like I have my 'game face' on and afterwards need time out just to recoup. I'm so glad it's not just me!

    x


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  11. We all need so me time every now and then - I know I certainly would if my house was crammed with so people after a party (although in all honesty I have social anxiety so the party would have been a no no for me in the first place haha!). I'm glad you got escape and having a relaxing day in your own company - there is no shame in that. I also enjoyed the pictures you shared.
    :-)
    Bits & Bobs

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  12. Me time is the most important time, we as humans spend so much time worrying about other people and trying to love them that we forget to worry about ourselves xo

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