Sunday, 14 July 2013

Being Ladylike

I like the idea of being ladylike. 
Apparently, I do tend to be- my friends at university laugh about how I refuse to talk about certain topics (mostly related to, ahem, bodily functions), my boss has commented on how I never swear (though personally I think it's incredibly unprofessional to swear in the workplace), and once, my sister was doing something unladylike and my middle nephew said "Mum, I really think we need to send you to Alice for lessons in how to be more ladylike!"

I think it's nice for a girl to be ladylike. I'm not going against women's liberation here- not in the slightest, I believe we should be equal and allowed to behave however we want, and if you want to drink pints, swear, and so on then I have nothing against this. And I'm certainly not asking for men to open doors for me, or wait on me hand and foot- life isn't like that. But just for me, I want to be a lady. And I think I do a pretty reasonable job at it. 

blair waldorf
I would very much like to be Blair Waldorf. (Or Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge) From here
I am polite. I say please and thank you, and will always wait for everyone to be served before starting my meal, or for everyone to finish before beginning to clear plates. I take gifts for hosts, smile when I don't feel like it, volunteer to make the tea, and am punctual to a fault.

One of the silly ladylike rules I believe in (and yes, I admit that sometimes being ladylike is silly) is that a lady never walks into a pub alone. I bend this slightly by only walking into a pub alone if I know that my group are inside- but if I can, I will wait outside for others to arrive or come to retrieve me, much to their amusement. 

From here

I mean- I'm not always like this. At home I can be pretty unladylike, and if I get stuck behind someone slow on my way home from work on a Friday you can bet that I'll be hopping around using words that a lady should never use. My skirts are probably often too short to truly be called "ladylike", I love my jeans, and I'm not in heels particularly often. But as a general rule, I like to look and act like a lady. I can't remember the last time I wore trousers to work, and I'm wearing a lot of pink at the moment. Though looking at these pictures has made me want to buy more neutrals- aren't they beautiful?!

From here
So yes. Another of my Mid-Year Resolutions is now to be more ladylike. Starting with wearing heels more often, being more positive, and reading Grace and Poise more frequently. I love this blog- it certainly reminds me of the importance of being elegant, poised, and graceful- even when I have a tendency to trip over my own feet. 

So I shall leave you with an amazing quote I found there yesterday. It's so, so true, in so many ways.

“It’s not very easy to grow up into a woman. We are always taught, almost bombarded, with ideals of what we should be at every age in our lives: “This is what you should wear at age twenty”, “That is what you must act like at age twenty-five”, “This is what you should be doing when you are seventeen.” But amidst all the many voices that bark all these orders and set all of these ideals for girls today, there lacks the voice of assurance. There is no comfort and assurance. I want to be able to say, that there are four things admirable for a woman to be, at any age! Whether you are four or forty-four or nineteen! It’s always wonderful to be elegant, it’s always fashionable to have grace, it’s always glamorous to be brave, and it’s always important to own a delectable perfume! Yes, wearing a beautiful fragrance is in style at any age!”
― C. JoyBell C I first saw this on Grace and Poise.

Would you call yourself ladylike? Do you have any ladylike rules you follow?


  1. I watch anything Audrey Hepburn and am instantly put in my place too. I thought I was ladylike and then my dreams are shattered when I realise that I am in fact not...

    Em x

  2. This is a wonderful example of feminism. Women should be able to act however and be whomever she likes {regardless of societal views}. Thank you for sharing that a woman can be polite, feminine, and classy without being labeled as anti-feminist. The whole point of feminism is having choices and embracing individuality.

    I share some of your ladylike rules. I also always send hand-written thank you notes.

    Samantha from

  3. This post was amazing, Alice! I try my best to be ladylike, as well and believe in many of the same little things that you do. My biggest dilemma right now is trying to think of a gift to take for my friend who is expecting when I visit her next week. I am getting totally worked up over it, which is sort of ridiculous, but I just can't show up at someone's house empty-handed, especially when last time I visited she gave me a gift! I think it pays to be a lady. I swear like a sailor when I'm just around friends, but in company or at work, I reign in my tongue. Fake smiles are daily practice for me, and please and thank-you worked so hard into my brain that I say them without thinking. I really would like to be more ladylike, though. I think that's an area almost every modern woman could work on! xx

  4. Nice post! I really like the hat from the first picture!



  5. I really like this post, and I think I'm going to try to join you in this resolution. I want to start dressing better at work, and I always wanted to be "put together".

    I need to cut back on my swearing though, but I definitely don't do it at work.

    Etiquette needs to make a come-back! :D


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